You’re child-free and can do what you want when you want!
But are you?
Today, I’m going to talk about what’s holding you back from fully embracing your Child-free lifestyle and 3 reasons why you will want to embrace it.
First, here are some common reasons you may not be fully embracing your CF lifestyle:
Societal Expectations
All your life societal norms have pressured you to live your life, or create your business, a certain way. Anything outside of that isn’t “normal” and gets backlash simply because you have different values, thoughts, and beliefs.
Sometimes it can be difficult to determine what opinions are your own vs. from society. This has a huge effect on decision making. Like doing things because you’re “supposed to” but in reality, you don’t want to. But you do it anyway to keep the peace. This is also how we become people pleasers. Except, you’re the one who is miserable.
It’s important to stand up for your own values and beliefs. With these boundaries comes respect, you teach people how to treat you, and you become more confident in who you really are.
Fear
Fear can also hold you back.
Here are a few types of fears and how they can prevent you from living your best life:
Fear of failure
This is perhaps the most common fear that people experience.
Many of us are afraid of failing and what that might mean for our self-esteem or reputation.To me, “failure” means things didn’t go the way I wanted it too, especially when many of those things were out of my control.
But once I stopped trying so hard and focused more on what I CAN control, it doesn’t emotionally hurt my ego as bad. Then I move on and try again or try something else.
Fear of success
First, let me say that success looks different for everyone and that’s ok!
Believe it or not, some people are actually afraid of succeeding. They may fear that success will bring too much attention or pressure, or that it will change them in ways they don’t want to.
I’ve actually felt like this, and still do some days. Sometimes I’m afraid that I won’t be able to physically or mentally handle my business if I have a flare up, etc. and not get the most out of life like I want.
But after all I’ve been through, I know I can handle whatever comes my way and I’ll continue building my business to support me on my off days.
Fear of rejection
Many people fear rejection, whether it’s in business hearing “no’s” when pitching our offers, or in personal relationships. This fear can keep us from taking risks and putting ourselves out there.
Fear of change
Change can be scary for many people, especially if it involves leaving our comfort zones and taking risks.
The thing is, change is inevitable, both good and bad.
Fear of the unknown
The unknown can be terrifying, as we often fear what we can’t see or understand.
This fear can be especially prevalent in business, where new ventures or opportunities may be uncertain. But that’s part of the journey!
You don’t need to always know everything that’ll happen. Instead, learn along the way. Besides, everything you’ve ever learned or done was unknown before you did it.
Fear of criticism
Fear of criticism can be a big obstacle to success, as it can prevent us from putting ourselves out there or pursuing our goals.
This was a big reason I didn’t start YouTube sooner. Now I know that no matter what I do or say, someone will have something to say about it. But my mission and helping others is bigger than myself so it’s more important to be myself and share anyway.
Fear of not being good enough
Many clients, and myself, struggled with feeling inadequate or not good enough, which can lead to a lack of confidence and a fear of trying new things. But being yourself… you’re already ahead of most people because you ARE good enough.
Overall, these fears can hold us back from pursuing our dreams and achieving our goals. It’s important to recognize them and work to overcome them, so that we can live our best lives and achieve success in our business and anything else
When you let fear control you, you’ll never get to where you want to go and can sometimes feel like groundhog day – same things day in and day out. Not moving forward because of “what if… “ and all the worst case scenarios. That’s no way to live.
Pushing through your fear is one of the major ways to get to where you want to go.
For example, I knew the only way to reach more potential clients and help more people was to speak up more. So to slowly gain my confidence in speaking in front of people and being on camera, was to stand up in front of hundreds of people and introduce myself. OR how I started getting more comfortable on video starting with IG stories then over to long form video with YouTube.
Do it scared anyway. It’s exciting and imagine all the opportunities and possibilities once you have it!
You’ll also grow your business faster by doing this. Then that confidence will spread into every aspect of your life.
Overwhelm
Overwhelm can also prevent you from living the life you want.
I love this explanation by Brene’ Brown when she talked about what overwhelm is and how overwhelm can prevent you from taking action, keeps you stuck with indecision. On her podcast Unlocking Us, Brene’ says that “When we say we’re overwhelmed, it’s really telling our body, “Things are happening too fast, we can’t handle them. Shut down. Shut down,”
“Instead, we need to assess if we’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed.”
“When we’re stressed, we feel a lot of outside (or even internal) pressure, but we can handle it. We know what actions to take to fix it. We can logistically and emotionally take on those actions, even if we’re concerned about how much time and effort they’ll take.
Overwhelm, on the other hand, means we’re incapable of taking action. We’re so consumed by the pressures on us that we can’t do anything about it.”
“Overwhelm means an extreme level of stress and emotional and or cognitive intensity to the point of feeling unable to function,”
Based on what Brene’ says, I think the big difference between stress and overwhelm is we can function during stress, but we can’t really function when overwhelmed.
So, what can you do if you feel extremely stressed out — and potentially overwhelmed?
Brene’ says to consider whether you’re stressed or actually overwhelmed. If you’re stressed, you’ll be able to continue to work as needed, even if it takes more effort.
If you’re overwhelmed — like, you can’t even begin to get the next thing done — you need to do nothing. Not “do nothing” and continue as normal, but literally do nothing.
Brene’s research shows that “nothingness is the only way to really reset after being overwhelmed.”
It should mean taking a complete step back from your life in order to reset.
No Clarity
Do you ever feel like you don’t fully know who you are, what you’re doing, or where you want to go in life?
When you don’t have a clear vision for your life, it’s like you set out for a hike in the mountains in a new location, without a map or compass. Without a destination (or milestone), you wander the day away and get turned around and go in circles. Meaning, you’ll stay lost and other people will tell you where to go and dictate what you do if you don’t become clear on what you want and why.
Knowing yourself is the first step to clarity. Who do you WANT to be?
Another reason holding you back from fully embracing your Child-free lifestyle is: No Strategy
A strategy is the first step before any planning can occur. Without it, it’s like throwing spaghetti at the wall to see what sticks. But a strategy is your like your battle a plan of action for implementing each step and task to get you where you want to go.
The main reasons you’re not fully embracing your child-free lifestyle is because of societal pressure, fear is stopping you, you’re overwhelmed, you need clarity, and need a strategy. All of these keep you stuck and spiraling.
These don’t have to hold you back any longer!
Here are 3 Reasons to finally embrace Your Child-Free Lifestyle
Your Child-Free Lifestyle can and will look different from mine. Perfect!
No matter how different our lives may look, here are 3 reasons to fully embrace yours.
Personal Freedom
To me this means that you get to do whatever the hell you want when you want, without answering to anyone. As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone.Which is probably one reason you started your business in the first place. This is independence in every form.
Without the extra responsibilities of kids, the only person you have to worry about is yourself, and maybe a partner, pet or plant. I feel a sigh of relief just saying that! haha
Financial Freedom
To me, Financial freedom means that I’ve got residual income, don’t have to worry about bills, and of course an emergency fund and started investing.
Financial Freedom will alleviate so much stress to give you the mental space to better support your clients and build your business.
The saying goes “money doesn’t buy happiness”, but I disagree.
Money is a tool that allows you to enjoy life’s experiences, like traveling to amazing places, financially helping the causes you want, and spoiling your friends and family, etc.
Mental Health
Ever since I’ve fully embraced my child-free lifestyle, my Mental Health has improved so much!
Now, let me add a Disclaimer: Of course therapy, EFT tapping, and life situations also had a huge impact as well.
AND finally embracing being the fun child-free aunt DINK business owner, and not giving fks about what society thinks about my choices has been so freeing. I’ve been so much happier in general too.
I realized that having a child of my own would be terrible for my mental health and full of resentment.
Since my mental health has been so much better, I’m more confident in who I am, what I want out of life, and able to handle situations with a clearer head and more calmly.
Another big reason to embrace your child-free lifestyle is for Environmental Responsibility
Without children of your own, your footprint on the planet is much lower. and you only have to worry about your personal footprint. From overpopulation, to trash, wasted food, etc.
This is one of the main reasons many child-free business owners I’ve talked to and met don’t have kids.
You’re able to improve the natural environment and reduce the impact that your business operations have on the environment as well.
Conclusion
Don’t let societal expectations, fear, overwhelm, lack of clarity and strategy hold you back any longer! I hope this inspires you to fully be yourself.
And I’m here for YOU. What was your biggest takeaway? Let me know in the comments.
Want support around how to gain time freedom and live an intentional child-free life? Book your free consultation.
