Did you know you have the power to make your own choices more often than you may think? Here are 7 things you get to choose.
1. You get to choose the lifestyle you want
Do you want a life that is fast-paced, full of adventure and bustling cities?
Or, do you prefer the slow life of enjoying nature, staycations, and being cozy?
Large house, fancy car, and quality clothes? Or a tiny home, paid off vehicle, and love to thrift?
Just because society tells you that you can only have a larger home if you plan to have kids doesn’t mean you can’t have that dream larger home. It’s ok to want to fill it with pets, hobby rooms, and home offices.
Whether you want one extreme or the other, or somewhere in-between, don’t let your budget, people-pleasing, or guilt prevent you from creating the life you want.
2. You get to choose to be childfree
I choose to birth ideas, not babies.
Did you know that being childfree is an active choice that I and many others have consciously made?
Maybe you’re one of them.
Maybe you didn’t know it’s a choice to have kids or not because society pushes it on you as a woman. Wondering if it’s actually your decision or theirs.
Whether it’s:
- Childhood trauma
- Don’t want to pass on mental or chronic illnesses
- Environmental concerns
- Accepted you can’t have kids
- You want to focus on your career
- You want to focus on your business
- You want more sleep
- Prefer to spend that money on hobbies, pets, etc. instead
- Motherhood simply isn’t for you
Any reason is enough.
While there can be many reasons behind one’s personal decision, many of us know what parenthood entails and it’s not a life I want.
I personally know many parents who are happy with kids and the responsibility that comes with them. I’m happy for them.
I also know of parents who have regrets. Had they known having kids was a choice, they may not have had them, or waited longer instead.
I also know many amazing people who are childfree because of one or more of the reasons in the list above and don’t have any regrets.
No one has the right to push their beliefs onto you about your sex life and lifestyle. It’s not their business.
Whether you decide to have kids or not, is YOUR choice. So is how you build your business.
3. You get to choose how to build your business
There are many ways to build your business.
- Social media
- Website
- Podcast
- YouTube
- Webinars
- Courses
- Coaching/Consulting
- Product-based
- Newsletters
- Ads
The list goes on.
There is no one right way to build your business, no matter what any guru says.
Yes, there are best practices to do each type of marketing and business model.
Every one of these tactics work well when done a certain way. Some people are simply better at them than others.
But that doesn’t mean you have to do all the things!
I like to focus on a Consulting business with a course for now, then add more digital and physical products later. You can always find me on Facebook and Instagram.
You get to choose what makes sense for you and your business. It’s a combination of what you like to do/use and where your clients hang out at.
Go all in on those.
4. You get to choose how you spend your time
Does your schedule reflect the life and business you want? Does people-pleasing tend to dictate your schedule?
Yes, time is very important, but so is your energy. They go hand in hand.
Your time and energy are both finite, important resources. The difference is, you can regain your energy, but not time. But, if you don’t make time to refill your energy, then you won’t regain that either.
It took a long time to not feel guilty about playing video games, as a gamer or watching tv as a homebody.
It’s one thing to game and watch tv while time slips away, it’s completely different when they are used as rewards and a way to relax with a time limit.
As a people-pleaser, it’s hard to say “no” to others.
You give your power to them, letting them decide when and how you choose your time and energy. When really, you feel obligated and maybe even resentful towards them.
So now your calendar is full of shit you don’t want to do and you don’t get anything done and put yourself and what you really want to the side.
Whether you spend your time and energy:
- Gaming
- Watching TV
- Reading
- Fitness
- On specific tasks
- Sleeping
- On clients
Spend that time with intention and do your best to not feel guilty about it. This includes self-care.
5. You get to choose your self care
Self-care may look different to you than it does to me.
It’s not all meditation, journaling and bubble baths after all.
Self-care can be:
- Intentionally watching tv or gaming to relax
- Being in nature
- Fitness
- Eating healthy
- Going to therapy
- Taking medication
- Putting boundaries in place
- Getting your nails done
- Crafting
- Creating art
- Being by yourself
- Celebrating achievements
- Having a slow morning routine
The list goes on.
Any combination of these, or something else
If you’re not sure what your self-care would look like, try something until you find something that sticks.
For example, I used to force myself to journal, do yoga, and stretch in the morning and evenings. After a couple months of trying to force it in the mornings, I realized I enjoyed it and benefited from it more in the evenings as a way to wind down before bed. And I journal when I feel like it.
The key here is to do what works for you. Not what everyone tells you to do.
6. You get to choose how you respond to situations
The thing about how you respond to situations is all about what you can/can’t control, beliefs, and trauma. So keep this in mind going forward.
Self-awareness will be your best friend once you realize this and start noticing when you’re triggered by certain things or people.
It took me a long time to not take things personally and be able to let stuff roll off that I would typically get really frustrated about.
Whatever situation you’re in or triggered by, ask yourself these questions:
Is this something I can control about myself?
Is this coming from something outside of my control?
Why am I being triggered?
Is this my belief or theirs?
Will I regret this in 5 years if I do/don’t do it?
Do these thoughts serve me?
Will this person add value to my life?
Do I really want to eat this?
What does my gut instinct say?
Is what they are saying really about me, or are they having a bad day?
Does what they are asking of me align with my business, lifestyle, or goals?
If I do this now, will it help me in the long-run?
Based on how you answered these questions for the situation, be sure to react logically AND emotionally. Not just out of emotion. Intuition can also help guide you in your decisions and how you react to them.
But remember, whatever happens, be aware of how you react based on your values, beliefs, trauma, and what you actually can control.
That includes your body.
7. You get to choose what you do with your body
You get to choose – What you put IN your body. What you put ON your body. What you
Whether it’s food, piercings, medications, tattoos, clothes, sexually or otherwise.
Your body. Your choice.
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Whatever the choice, you have the power to choose or not. If you don’t, someone else will choose for you.
What will you choose?
